A language all its own...

I love Starbucks.  I am such a fan - its disgusting.  I spend on average about $1500.00 per year with them.  Maybe more because I will take anyone there who hasn't experienced this lovely nectar and introduce them to the Starbucks Experience.  In my neighborhood - they are about 10 blocks away from each other.  I know each and everyone.  The baristas know my drink of choice and I always leave with the best cup of coffee in town.
 
I know I do because I have tried them all.  I live in a town thats trying to revamp itself with neat coffee houses and spectacular restaurants and cute clothing stores and relaxing spas.  I believe you should try to keep the money in the 'hood.  So, I gave them a shot. Bleecch.
 
Some people said I should make my own.   Once again, I have tried - I failed.  Double Bleech.
 
What is it about Starbucks?  Is it because they have thier own language?  I like a Triple Grande Almond Latte.  This means a medium expresso - three shots with steamed milk and some almond syrup.  If I ordered it as I explained it - it would then be shouted to the Barista as Starbuckanese.  Like a Frappachino.  Its sounds good, tastes good - but its really only an iced blended coffee.
 
My boyfriend doesnt get the language.  He thinks somehow it makes him "gay" to say the words Triple Grande Almond Latte.  He says that - because of the Starbuckanese that gives them every right to charge me $4.23 for a .99 cent cup of coffee. 
 
I am starting to wonder.  Could he be right?
 
So - last night we venture into Cold Stone Creamery.  Guess what they have...?  Yep,  a language all their own. I will call it Creamanese.  I got a LoveIt Germanchocolatakake.  Description they take ordinary chocolate icecream and them mix alot of goodies in it.  Taste great - good portion and lots of stuff in it.  Well - we get to the cashier.  The total for two...over $10.00.  I could have gone into Winn Dixie and bought all the stuff needed to make it and still have leftovers for days for $10.00.
 
oh geez - Now I just had a moment of panic.  Remember the Eddie Murphy movie where he is making fun of his Mom because he wanted McDonalds?  She said she could make the same thing with stuff she had in the fridge?  So she made a meatball with green onions and placed it between two slices of white bread.  This does not a cheeseburger make.  But it was less costly.
 
I feel the Mommy gene kicking in - I actually thought for a moment that "I" could in fact duplicate the "Creamery" experience.  Didnt I learn with the "Starbuck" making my own coffee fiasco?!?
 
Ok - breathe....Every Mom reading this - please raise your right hand. 
 
I do solemnly swear that I will never, ever, ever try to recreate, make, or substitute something for the real thing.  No matter what the cost.  Amen.
 
You and I both know its never the same - anyways.